It Doesn't Get Any Easier...

I honestly do not know where to begin. This has been a week of anger, tears, rage, frustration, and sadness. And I still have one more day until the weekend.

On Monday I was called to a permanency planning staffing. These staffing's are always held when child abuse investigators are trying to determine whether or not a child should come into care. The team is compromised of investigators, family preservation workers, foster care workers, attorneys, and the big dog. Any time I am called to represent foster care in one of these meetings, I try to go in with an open mind, look at all the possibilities, look at all of the alternatives to prevent a child from coming into care. Because believe or not, the last thing I want is for another child to come into care. (That is probably why the supervisor for investigations dislikes me so much.)

But I wasn’t prepared for this, I honestly don’t think anyone in that room was prepared for this. You would think that with almost 10 years of working in child welfare, I would be immune, not jaded, just emotionally able to handle anything put before me. But like I said, I wasn’t prepared for this.

This was a case of a 3 year old boy with down syndrome, so severely beaten, the bruises covered his face, his back, his legs, his stomach, and his arms. The bruises were so clear and so distinct, I could see them in the pictures the big dog and lead investigator were looking at from across the room. The beating was so severe, the pattern of the belt imprinted on the child’s body. I wasn’t prepared for this, wasn’t prepared for the severity, never expected to see pictures this graphic. I had to walk away and gather my composure. Rage began kicking in, this was a 3 year old innocent child, worse, it was a child with a disability. But I was going to be objective, listen to what the investigators had to say, TRY to come up with the best solution to the situation.

And then the investigators stated that the child was in the hospital because there was a possibility of internal bleeding. Internal bleeding??? WTF did they do to this innocent child. And to make matters worse, no one, I repeat, no one in the family could say how the child received the bruises. They all had the same story, “Johnny” fell running down the hill. Folks, I am here to tell you, my child runs down hills, she falls, she gets bruises, but she DOES NOT come home covered head to foot in black and blue bruises with internal bleeding from a fall down the hill. And no one, no one could say how the child got the bruises, just that he got them when he fell. The final decision, go out, talk to the family again, see if there are any family members willing to sign an agreement to protect the child from further abuse and neglect. The case haunted me for the remainder of the day. I went home with a migraine and prayed there was someone for this child to go to, someone who could protect this child from further harm.

On Tuesday, the images of the child kept haunting me. He is just 3 years old, still a baby. Why? Why would someone do this?

On Wednesday the Big Dog called me and stated that an emergency permanency planning meeting was being called and I needed to be present. Oh, please, oh, please, let there be a solution. No, worse, according to the investigator, “Johnny” also has a heart condition. The family continues to state that “Johnny” fell running down a hill. “Johnny” who is speech delayed simply states he had an accident. Due to “Johnny’s” difficulty of care, there are no family members willing to take him home with them. The extended family members’ response “if they say they did not do it, then they did not do it, but it would probably be best if he was placed in foster care.” WTF???

Why? Why did this have to happen to an innocent child? This job doesn’t get any easier, and even though I have been doing this for close to 10 years, you are never truly prepared for something like this. I heart breaks for this child that he will have to be placed in foster care and not with family. I am angry with the family that no one will take this child home with them. And I am furious that someone would do this to an innocent child, no less a child with a disability.

We, not only the social worker or child welfare agencies, but the community at large, have a duty to protect children from abuse and neglect. We cannot turn our back to a child’s safety. But instead of trying to find a solution, Federal and State Government continue to cut budgets, groups rally together to rail about the "evil" child welfare system. Social workers with limited resources and stretched to their capacity scramble to do their best to meet the needs of children such as "Johnny."

This isn't about whose right or wrong, or is with sin or without, this is about that child who currently lies in the hospital due to severe child abuse. This is about ensuring the safety of all children. This job doesn't get any easier, no matter how much experience you have or how prepared you are. When I started my job 10 years ago, I was told that my role as a child welfare social worker was to put myself out of a job by ending abuse and neglect. It's 10 years later...